Let’s talk about the society and problems I am encountering.
During my research, I spiraled from incredible stress, to my mental health deteriorating to a physical manifestation, that resulted in me almost ending up hospitalized. I was so weak and tired I could barely sit for 30 minutes before falling asleep. Intellectually, I know I am capable of doing a masters, no problem. But I am in no way willing to compromise my mental or physical health for it. I would rather end up in an ice cream shop than compromise it. This was why I almost dismissed research entirely. My health is the one thing to me right now that is worth more than work. Here is an article that sums up my feelings well.
I feel like I live outside the bubble of society and am just an outsider staring in from a different perspective. More and more, I find our culture as a whole to be incredibly fake and disingenuous. What is with all these masks people put up? I have come to realize there is no harm in being yourself, being open, and genuine in all your interactions. How else do you get to know someone without this? I am saddened about the superficiality and lack of genuine communication and consequently, lack of genuine connection because people are unwilling to open up easily. It is difficult to find people who are willing to be themselves.