MindWanderings

The thoughts & ramblings of a young mind

Shit.

The moment when you realize one of your references you used on EVERY single application may have costed you a year’s worth of applications and interviews (8+..) and been a good part of the reason for your failure to get jobs.

HOLY ROYAL MOTHER FUCKING GOD. I kept giving her amazing reviews too.  Fuck. No more.

I’m just devastated.

And now not only am I feeling down, but I’m terrified how the rest of my references are.  I. NEED. good references.  But I screw up on every single job in an unimpressive way.  I’m just.. not meant to be doing this.  I’m a total fraud, and even the imposter syndrome isn’t true because I’m NOT a frigging high achiever no matter how hard I try.  I’m not top of the class.  I’m a mediocre nobody struggling silently in a field I was never meant to be in.

gotta live and learn.  bad references can fuck you up real good.

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