MindWanderings

The thoughts & ramblings of a young mind

Archive for the month “August, 2014”

family fucked-ups

my father is aggressive.  my mother is passive aggressive/useless.  when I state an opinion that does not match his, my dad uses personal attacks and my mother acts only as a bystander.  she will then approach me hours afterwards to tell me she agrees with me but doesn’t want to fight with him so kept quiet.  this repeats.  every. fucking. time.  fuck. I can’t stand this place.  they are the reason why I can’t stand passive aggression and aggression in such an extreme way that i turn immediately to dislike.  I’ve trained myself to hate both these extremes.

who am i.

i am someone with no opinion.  an empty mind.  i’m quiet not because i’m very timid, but because i have nothing to say.  i don’t know what to say.  and i struggle with this everyday.  and my conversations suffer because of this.

disgust. disrespected. just all round bad times.

Being told that I should have a problem with my own height because I am way too short and that it’s a problem I’m so happy with it, that I should reconsider my career choice because no guy likes calloused hands, calling me names for being very tanned from working outside all day, that I’m too fat or too skinny, and that my birth was not by their free will and they wished they never had me..  it’s what I deal with everyday, the reason why I dread going home, and it’s disgusting that it’s said by my parents in seriousness.

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